I just read this story on another blog and had to share. I think the author wanted to convey to the readers what its like to be a parent of a child with a disability. I think it can work for anyone either as a parent or someone trying to realize their life doesn't revolve around their ideal circumstances, but it is still Holland. For me, its what its like being a single mom. It may not be my original plan but Avery makes this the sweetest adventure and I am so glad that she is mine.
"Welcome to Holland"
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome To Holland".
"Holland?!?" you say, "What do you mean "Holland"??? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy"
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around…and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills...Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned".
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away...because the loss of that dream is a very significant loss.
But...if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things...about Holland.
© 1987, by Emily Perl Kingsley.
Monday, November 3, 2008
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1 comment:
I have always loved that essay! I admit I hadn't though of it in terms of single moms. When I think of it now it is applicable to anyone that finds what they originally thought was an insurmountable challenge is actually a blessing.
BTW - I've been enjoying your music, have you ever heard Nicolette Larson's 'Sleep, Baby Sleep"? I bet you'd like it!
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